LIFE

Let's catch up:

More yoga.  MORE YOGA!  I have had some big goals in yoga and have probably mentioned my realization at not taking full advantage of my access to reach them.  Now there are more days in my life and more time on my schedule to bend and flex toward a better me and a stronger body. Daily. From breathing, to how I connect with other living things, and even getting my ass above my head more often.  It must go down that way: through practice.  And not from thinking about it or dipping my toe in the lake of greatness that could be.. but taking a dive into what is and what's possible.

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I ran my first race in over a year on Turkey Day and it was in another city (which has been a goal--and still is--on my list).  On Thanksgiving 2014, I ran a 4.5 mile race in Indianapolis with my boyfriend and his family before partaking in the annual holiday feast that we all know and love.

REMINDER:  I was injured and am working on recovery on my right hip.

The kicker is not only did I run a race. Not only did I not stop at all. I ran it faster than any other race I've done!  I ran 4.5 miles averaging sub 10 min each mile.  What whaaaat!  That's huge!  And I am so damn proud of myself which gets me amped to finish this 100 miles by Dec as well as the half marathons I'll be running throughout the year in 2015.  Much like the yoga, reaching goals takes practice and this totally helped to make the vision of running in 2015 more clear.

Yay!  Also was spotted by the boo at the end and he ran alongside me with a few notes of inspiration and a way to get out of my head and back out into the world by talking about other things. 

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Hubert.  That's my humidifier.  He's bomb.

I am at a space in my health life that I have my stable foundation that works and it's not always lifting weight or eating salad. Usually it's things like using a humidifier, eating protein after workouts, and sleeping.

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Friends.

I'm a loner and a social butterfly. If the test of refueling is true then technically I am an introvert because I get my energy from being alone. But I love me some humans! They're nice. And they make me laugh. They are good to dance with. And nothing beats realizing that you all have a strength or struggle in common.

So here is a pic of me with a few peeps that are cool and can catch the beat.  :)  Dalia and I both teach at the same fitness studio, her fiancé, my boyfriend giving all that 'tude at the top, plus a mutual friend James (Dalia and I both had acquaintance with him before we ever made acquaintance with one another. Trippy!)

We danced and drank good drinks in downtown Chicago on a warm autumn night a time ago. It was fun!

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And finally dinner at Café Ba Ba Reeba in LP.

My company prides itself on connection and interpersonal relationships.  So one night we took Ambassadors of our store out to dinner for tapas served family style and it was really cool.

We talked and drank vino and would pause every few minutes to bring a focus to presence.  What it means to us and our leadership and the holidays. It was so romantic.  To flirt with ideas and look life on the eye and tell it you love it. 

It was next level for us as individuals and as and team. I'm so grateful that I was able to participate and kick off the season with such intent. (This is a partial capture of the super messy table that we left behind that night.)

Life

The last few weeks have been filled with a lot of delight.

I checked out the Greenline Coffee in the  Woodlawn community in Chicago.  The company is an extension of Sunshine Ministries that employs youth with job training skill and knowledge.  My favorite part is seeing them flex their customer service muscles.  I had a Nutella waffle with berries + bacon and eggs on the side of.   They use a pearl sugar (which could be a normal sugar--but I'm not connoisseur) and the sweetness is just right.

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I've also been exploring what health & fitness means to me.  So I've decided to transform my regimen around my goals and less about being fit or strong. 

What's resulted is having my toosh in yoga classes almost three times a week!  I've had a goal to be able to do a handstand (starting with a wall-free forearm stand) for a long time now and just realized that a yoga class here and there won't get me to that experience.  #duh #shouldHAVEhadAv8MELISSA #headKNOCK

The bending and stretching gets easier and more challenging by the day!  And I am finding the beauty in: staying in your own lane.  It's a practice that means that I don't bend or flex to impress anyone.   I just do what makes me feel strong and beautiful.   Yes I will push myself to a pose I've never tried or want to perfect or even know that I cannot do.. but "standing forehead to knee" pose just gives me attitude when I even think about it.  So I stand strong in my single-leg mountain pose "thing" like a freaking BOSS!

But you better believe I'm taking wheel.  And I'm doing one leg and then the other!  Wheel is my JAM!  I like to say that I'm just "a wheelin' and a dealin'", laugh at my cornyness, and move on.

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I realized this morning that I'm plugged in with some industrious and socially tuned in people and had to share about my friend Lydia's production projects: 18th And Bronzeville & The Armoire From.   18th And Bronzeville is a full production house with Lydia handling the biz, her friend Staci making the art come alive, and Akeea getting the buzz out on behalf of the artist.

The Armoire From is their first production mini-comedy-series about a man who is struck with amnesia and is trying to navigate a situation or two having lost his short-term memory.  The idea of it is hilarious and from what I've seen, the process of getting it done is successful!

On Monday, 18th and Bronzeville did a kickstarter fundraising event at North Bar in Chicago and not only was it great to meet some more dope people but I've reconnected with some great friends and associates from 10 years ago (or more).

In that pic it's myself, Lydia, and Morgan.  We started kindergarten together and all graduated from the same high school!

It's so funny because we used to laugh at our parents saying: "I've known so & so for 20 years!"  Back then that seemed so long and impossible.. and yet here we are!

Click this link to get your give on.

--

X
Melissa

Trying to create a life where my actions match my word.. + my fitness inspirations [PICS]

So..

I don't think I've been to the gym in MONTHS.  I run, workout at home (rarely), and take fitness classes; but I haven't plugged in my earbuds and pumped iron in a very long time.

Yesterday I was getting SUPER stressed over something kind of stupid and it occurred to me that the super emotional side of me over the past few months probably is a result of my diet getting more dirty and my lifting getting more scarce!  Don't get me wrong.. I would always try to take classes that involved a lot of strength versus cardio, but it just isn't the same.

Because I'm on this mission to create possibility and greatness and this big, lovely, life for myself I realized that being a woman of my word (to myself and others) might just be the pivot point on the rest of my success.  Perhaps it's only a big part & not the center, but it's still major.  Keeping your word.. Living out your fantasies.. They're only an utterance and action away!  If I dream of running 5 miles in the morning (which I do) then I should just get up and go run them.  I shouldn't talk myself down to being more reasonable because of my schedule for the day, community, weather, etc.  I should simply do it.  Maybe I won't do it first thing in the morning every time, but I'll put it on my list of things to do and make the time for that greatness to appear in my life.  That connection between my behavior and my higher self where "proud" happens.  Those are my favorite moments.

In order for me to be this "woman of my word", I went ahead and reactivated my gym membership yesterday!  :  )  I'm so excited to get back in the best shape of my life.  Lifting heavy and often is my favorite way to break a sweat.  Alone.  My music.  My level.  My goals.  My time.  My drive.

I also think that this change will get my eating back on target as well.  There was a point where I ate like a bodybuilder.  Clean eating (ENOUGH CALORIES FOR MY LIFESTYLE.. NO STARVING MYSELF), lots of water, simple recipes, real food.. all the time.  It got kind of scary though.  I was nowhere near having an eating disorder, but the amount of focus I had on my diet even starting to judge others for theirs.. it was ugly and it had to stop.  I definitely think that I took it too far when I backed off, but now that I know the two extremes then I am looking forward to finding my happy medium for my nutrition practices.  Basically truly adopting the Michael Pollan's mantra:  Eat food.  Not too much.  Mostly plants.

I am going to ease back into the gym, w/ split days, three days a week.  I used to do almost six days, but I gotta take baby steps.  I'll do, lower/upper/core OR lower/upper/full spread between Thursday, Friday, and Saturdays, when I can help it.  (I'll be in the gym three days a week, though.)  At least one yoga class per week.  One fitness class per week (probably cycling for a while.  I'm really bad at it and want to improve).  Maybe a tabata session in my home or at the gym or studio.  Not sure.  But it comes down to gym time @ 3 days per week, yoga once a week, a fun fitness class once a week, and I'll run often.  I know I want to get up to about 5 miles on average, but I just don't know how often I want to do it, yet.  I'm gonna give myself room to find my running sweet spot through the fall.

My vision for my ideal workout week starting in Winter '13 is (in no particular order)...
Day 1  3-5 Mile Morning Run + Bi's, Tri's, Chest
Day 2  3-5 Mile Morning Run + Back, Core
Day 3  3-5 Mile Morning Run + Glutes, Quads, Hammies (aka LEG DAY!! lol)
Day 4  3-5 Mile Morning Run + Yoga
Day 5  3-5 Mile Morning Run or Rest + Class
Day 6  3-5 Mile Morning Run + Cardio Day or Rest
Day 7  Rest Day or Active Rest Day :)

I am SOOOOOOOO excited to get back to ME!  I lost 30 lbs by being me and I'll get stronger by being me.  Drooling at the thought of amazing shoulder, ab, and glute definition.  Excited by the potential sounds of clinks and weights dropping to the floor.  Sweat.  Life.  Love.  PASSION.  Get ready America *super hero finger point*cape flapping in the wind* it's ON.  :  )  YAY!!

LATER!!  OMW to the gym.

LOTS OF LOVE!

Melissa B.

AND..

Each of these ladies below inspire me to run, lift, eat, and live like it matters.  I'm not a favorites kind of person nor am I fanatic about anyone, but once my fitness journey began, I looked/look to these ladies for tips and tricks of the trade.  Amazing strength right here:

Chady Dunmore/FitMiss

Chady Dunmore/FitMiss

Manko/Mankofit

Manko/Mankofit

Samantha Jo Alonso/Mission: I'm Possible

Samantha Jo Alonso/Mission: I'm Possible

Robin Arzon/Bridge Runners NYC

Robin Arzon/Bridge Runners NYC

Amber Elizabeth/CLUTCH

Amber Elizabeth/CLUTCH

Lyzabeth Lopez/Hourglass Workout

Lyzabeth Lopez/Hourglass Workout

Ashley Conrad/CLUTCH

Ashley Conrad/CLUTCH

Karena Dawn/Tone It Up

Karena Dawn/Tone It Up

I love my job. Grace. Enlightenment.

So this week I did another level of training at my job with some cool peeps from all over the region.

In it, we talk about communication and goals.  The lovely thing about it is that we actually learn it in a way that we can apply it to our personal lives as well as to our guests that we encounter at least 15 hours per week.  After listening to one of the recordings, I say, "I love this company."  I honestly wanted to hold back, and keep the glee to myself, but I just couldn't help it!  This was on Thursday.

Just a few days before that day, my company sent me to Landmark Forum where I, with at least one other person (of 145), had the opportunity to SHIFT my perspective and transform my 'self', as I know me, into this NEW person.  THAT was a great experience.  I can explain the encounter, but won't ever have words for the feelings that I have since that weekend.  So appreciative of that moment.

So now it's almost two weeks later and life has settled in again.  The new way of thinking is still there, but doubt and fear are trying to creep their way back in to my thoughts and behavior.  Gratefully, I am able to now capture them and examine them.  Sometimes they get past, but most of the time I send them back to where they came from (the pits of hell?  the North Pole?  Detroit?  lines at the Department of Motor Vehicles?) and I'm happy that I can really do that these days.

What I've learned to do is separate my story from the truth of what's happening.  To not let one bad encounter spiral into the backdrop of my entire day, life, or perspective.  (It's deep, y'all.)  It's freed up a lot of time and energy because I am able to focus on the moments that I'm in as they come to me.

I have to admit, there has been a convo in my head about:  WHAT IF I THINK A NEGATIVE THOUGHT?  What if I forget the strategy?  This could happen, right?  Moments where we awaken to a bright day and every now and then when a bad mood strikes that day or week, we get the chance to compare the two paradigms and see that we lost a little control there or here in this present moment because of X, Y, or Z? 

But isn't that what happiness and anger are?  Losing control?  Super happy experiences usually happen because something happened to you.  You can't create those mornings where you imagine that you're Cinderella and all the doe are prance around while blue birds tie your hair into the most PERFECT messy bun.  Those mornings usually just happen and you always seize the opportunity to just bask in it, don't you? You do the same thing when you're angry, too.  You're living your life and suddenly something happens and your mood just sets. you. off.!  You feel attacked and defensive, suddenly you want to just FIGHT or FLEE!  Or YOU CAN'T DECIDE WHICH TO DO..so you shut-down altogether.  Sometimes this is on the same day, or maybe a few months later. 

Do you see how thin the line that I'm drawing it?  Sure you can create happy and sad through action and thought, but never the experience because the feeling happens as a result of what you THINK might make you happy or sad.  You usually find yourself waiting around for those results!  (HOLY doctor's clinic waiting room!  Right?  haha)

And that's where at least one point of this post is about to be presented...

BUT THEN THERE'S GRACE. 

In the Christian belief, 'grace' is:  "the free and unmerited favor of God, as manifested in the salvation of sinners and the bestowal of blessings."  (According to my MacBook.)  I also think that it's safe to say in the non-Christian belief, people understand one of the definitions of 'grace' to be this (+/- God) as well.

So you're in one of these places of happiness and anger.  Or forgiveness, bitterness, courage, or fear, right?  You might feel like you should be more consistently peaceful and if you DO get any bad vibe, you should handle it a certain way as your new and glad self should not be phased by others or external influences.  And a brand new struggle abounds within your psyche between gladness or irritability.  Never you fear dear reader--dear friend-- now you have a new standard that frees you from this vicious cycle of 'would haves' and 'should haves'.  YOU have the ability to remind yourself of 'grace'.  Undeserving, unwarranted, favor for your life.  No matter what you do.  What you say.  Where you are.. the good things that are coming to you in your life are going to come despite any slip that you take into a positive or negative mindset in your moment!  You can't do a thing to stop God's plan from succeeding, my love.  It's going to go down whether you like it or not.  So why even begin the self-abuse again?

Perfection is boring, truly impossible to reach, and relative anyway.  Have you ever been a guest at an event that went off without a hitch?  You loved the music, ambiance, food, and crowd?  THAT'S because the event planner dealt with rip-offs, no-shows, spoiled food, and party-crashers BEHIND the scenes for at least a month and even on the night you are there hobnobbing with your peers and loved ones!  Thankfully, someone in our lives is in a control like this even beyond our experience.  Someone who has set it in place that you will have a good time in this life (and in my Christian case.. another that's coming after this) as long as we just promise to show up every day and experience it with that guarantee in mind.

This morning, when I started to get a little upset w/ myself because I hadn't really applied the lingo of Landmark & my development course to my life in a few situations over the weekend, I simply remembered a mantra created by this cool chick named Emily Ley that says:  I hold myself to a standard of GRACE not perfection. 

OF COURSE I want a great life.  I want peace.  I want to manage.  I want to smile.  I want power.  I want to lead.  But, if I get hung up on doing those things perfectly, I won't get there.  YES.. I might 'get there', but it will take a lot for me to hold to strings that tie it all together.  If I simply apply great truth to my life, go out and live it, let go, and .. LET GOD.  THEN I will truly have those chances (plus more) in my great life where I do great things, hang with great people and feel great hope and wonder every day.  WHEW!  WHAT. A. RELIEF!!

So I invite you to hold yourself to a standard today.  A standard where you allow yourself some wiggle room to be authentic.  Experiencing real life.  Loving moments that are really happening to you.  All this because you work at it.  Not to do all of these things perfectly, but to do all these things knowing that your efforts will pay off, and when you forget to apply them, it doesn't matter because you're still in good standing with the most high--and that's all that matters.

I hope you're encouraged to be yourself today.  I hope that this post brought you overwhelming peace.

God bless.. here are some pictures of me living my life imperfectly..

LOVE YOU GUYS!  Have fun taking it easy on yourselves!  :  )

xoxo
Melissa

at the Moet Rose Lounge w/ great peeps!

driving range :)

Black Girls Run! meet-up pre 5k race!

BETTER THOUGHTS: Mediocrity.

Hmm..

Lately, I have been doing a great job at being me.  I'm on time (unless random things pop up), I'm usually kind, I work hard, I have fun, ya know, the usual.  I've been so good at being me that I was chosen to go to brunch with the man/guy/gentleman/dude (? take your pick, whichever you think is the most appropriate) who started the company that I work for.  Yep!  I had brunch with the type of guy you expect Richard Branson to be.  Funny, in good health, brilliant, mega rich, and reachable.  **I DIDN'T HAVE BRUNCH WITH RICHARD BRANSON**  (YET!)

So we're chillin', the nine of us, and we start to talk about BHAG's (company jargon for BIG HAIRY AUDACIOUS GOALS--goals that really scare you but you want to accomplish in the next 10 years), the philosophy of the company, and marijuana, etc.  #slightWORK We ask interesting questions and hear interesting and surprising answers.  The food was really good and the company was great. The entire table was stock full of personality, quirkiness, and glow.  We laughed, I'm sure we would have sang if the chance arose, and we listened to each other fully.

Here is where I get to the point...

The vision of my company is:  elevating the world from mediocrity to greatness

In that four hours time where we literally were hanging out with a true visionary, one of the big things that I can remember are how his voice, temperament, and body language changed when he was talking and suddenly the word "mediocrity" came out of his mouth.  When it fell out, he filled up with passion about and maybe a bit of pity (unless that's not a Landmarky thing to say) for how people live mediocre lives.  How okay we are with just getting by.  How averted we are to being great, and how it's almost first nature for us to dwell there and build our lives on that weak foundation!

I didn't shrink, because that man is really a good person, so his intention was to simply state the facts; but I did feel like he was talking about ME for those few, long, seconds.

DON'T GET ME WRONG!!! .. I do a lot of great things every day!  I feel my greatest when I workout, help/encourage others while training or coaching them, and when I make people laugh.  I think that there is greatness in everything.  At the same time, however, I do know that I make a lot of decisions that aren't in my favor almost every day.  Putting a workout off 'til the next day, waiting 'til the last minute to bust a move from my house to work, skipping a study session just 'cause I'd rather watch videos online for another 20 minutes..  All choices I make, regret, and make again way too often.

By definition, mediocre means:  of only moderate quality; not very good.  It doesn't mean that you or I suck.  Or that we are unworthy of life.  It simply means that there is not much quality to us or that we're not very good/good enough to remember (think:  legacy).  It means regular.  Everyday.  "Unthrilling".

So my question is how can we all be GREAT?  While we're on our way to our family, first million dollars, tenure, or retirement, how can we be great at it?  Let's face it, we all don't want to pop champagne bottles at the club nor do we all want to beg for food and shelter!  I do think that we all inherently want to be remembered, though.

Brendon Burchard has based a lot of his work on this statement: 

"At the end of our lives, we will all ask: Did I live? Did I love? Did I matter?"

No matter how much we try to fight it, you know he's right.  What makes it even worse is that we KNOW that in order to get the answer we all want, "YES", we MUST do great things day in and day out to achieve it.

We have to do the little great things and the big great things!  Go to our workout.  Tell that guy/girl to stop texting because it's upsetting our loved one.  Move to another city.  Get your LLC.  Those ALL count and they all are the extreme opposite of being basic.

There's actually nothing more to say because it really does speak for itself.  Spending time every day or week perfecting our craft (the current craft and the craft that you hope will become your main craft eventually) so that our skill is undeniably great and is impossible to be denied or deemed uninspiring, unlovable, and unimportant.  At the same time, it means that we spending time every day/week doing great things for ourselves and the ones we love.  We might take baby steps in the beginning, but once we get the hang of elevating ourselves, we will be hooked and taking leaps and bounds instead.  I'll even be daring to say that it might turn us into JUNKIES!  Greatness seems like the one high that can be topped and isn't of any danger to ourselves, careers, or families doesn't it?

SO where and how are you the most mediocre in your life?  Where are you great?  How can you elevate?  By when?

LET'S GO, FOLKS!  Mediocrity is not our fate and is certainly not required of us at all.  Be great, don't explain yourself, and don't apologize for dripping it on the carpet as you exit the waiting room.  I'll see you all at the top!

I LEAVE YOU WITH A WORD FROM KANYE WEST:

"I ain’t here to apologize to no muthaf–kers man."

lol

THE END.

RANDOM THOUGHT AFTER INITIAL POST:  CAN YOU EVEN IMAGINE WHAT IT'S LIKE TO WAKE UP AND BE GREAT EVERY DAY???  LIKE... EVERY DAY?  Where you go to bed because you lived a full, great, inspired life each night?   That must be amazing!!  I hope to do every day so well, that I am inspired by my own dang self.  THAT REALLY MUST BE SOMETHING... *hopeful sigh & smile*

BETTER BODY: F**K THAT *Kendrick Lamar voice*

B-DAY WKND w/ my sis :)

When people find out that I've lost 30 lbs, they always ask me how I did it and when I think about it, one of the main keys to my success was my DIET (and sleeping).

Changing the way that I was eating changed my mind and my body.  I was clear, light, happy, shedding weight, and I really felt quite mature because I was making healthy choices left & right.

The catch is, however, that I never really made a crazy big change beside cutting out fast food/restaurant food and making sure I ate less from packages and more from my own skillets.

The other day I was walking down the street and had wanted to satisfy my craving for late-night style tacos and dropped into a random joint to grab some super unhealthy handheld munchies.  NOT a good idea.  I honestly don't feel bad about eating it, but my body definitely rejected them LOUD & CLEAR!  haha

I definitely don't eat as clean as I used to when I began my journey, but I definitely still do 75-80% healthier choices (even if it's food from 7-Eleven).  I was so surprised by the physical reaction that I just knew that eating clean is pretty much my only choice at this point.  It's definitely something that I want to keep up, but for a second I was becoming a little anal, and it really scared me, so I backed off in a major way.

I don't want to set a rule for my diet, but if I had to, the idea would be to eat clean 80-90% of the time and eat really really dirty (in a good/quality way) about 10-15% of the time.  I was headed down the road towards vegan, but it wasn't really founded an anything sturdy, so at this point--with all of the understanding of clean eating that I have--I imagine that I will be eating vegan/veggie/pesky (that's my way of saying PESCETARIAN) most of the time.  I think I'm mostly afraid of never eating pork bacon, hamburgers, and steak again.  (Not in a negative way but in a...I REALLY LIKE BACON, HAMBURGERS, AND STEAK, kinda way.)

I also don't think I'll be going vegan because I wanna be prepared for whatever is in store for our nation and world.  Part of the reason that I train and the reason I eat well (and want to keep beef, chicken, & pork in my diet) is because I'm afraid of being in some DOOM situation where it's 2059 and we HAVE to eat fake cow meat by government ordinance.  I just want my stomach to be ready for that... AND SO I'll practice with real beef & pork now!

lol

The beef, pork & chicken intake will not be high at all, but when I want it (or if it's the only option) then I will have it!  And I will try to make it at home vs ordering it.  SIMPLE!

My way of achieving this lifestyle is:

• buy salmon/fish once a week
• buy spinach for eating & smoothies once a week
• trying new recipes OFTEN ... not once a week, I can't commit to that
• make a staple shopping list over the next few months for my "no brainer" dishes
• eat 3 homemade meals a day for 4-6 days per week (If I eat out, it has to be a light and big salad for at least 6 out of those 9 potential meals.)

I have always envisioned myself as a veggie/veganesque girl, but I also think it's important to make sure I'm doing it the healthy way.  I have SO many vegetarian friends who only eat packaged food and that's just so backwards to me!  Eating clean is where it's at and it's possible and affordable enough for ANYBODY to do.  I'm still going to have the cravings, I'll just have to develop a little discipline to make sure I just cook those meals myself and not spend the $3-$50 dollars on them at places outside of my home.

Manifesto from the book In Defense of Food #reminder

So goodbye, JUNK FOOD!  Chips, pop/soda, and multiple fast-food stops, that snuck back into my life.  You're banished!  I love you & I'll visit from time-to-time at Super Bowl parties, but you gotta go and I gotta stay true to the happy, healthy, thug in me. 

If you are on some kind of fitness/diet journey.  It REALLY suggest that you read the book IN DEFENSE OF FOOD:  An Eater's Manifesto by Michael Pollan.  I really helped me to change my mind about my thoughts on food w/o really trying.  VERY good book.  VERY good notes.  ENJOY!

Much Love!

Melissa B. :)
xox

BETTER THOUGHTS: The Longer You Wait, The Longer You Wait/DARE AND FEAR GREATLY

I'm learning in life that there are two types of people.  There are the 'daring' and there are the 'fearing'.  Both of them are necessary because they bring a balance to the world and keep things running smoothly.  Where it gets interesting is in the crux of the crossroads of the two.  Although there are ONLY the two types of people, there are a few of us who get a little confused by the road signs leading us down whichever path they are meant to be on.

Fearful people aren't weak or invaluable, but they are the people who honor the law and rules of the land.  They keep people organized and are super great at playing their role in the lives of their friends and their work environment.  They keep things steady and they definitely value a good reminding of what's what to who; where, why, when, and how.  I love fearful people.  I need more of them in my life.

The daring folks are the ones who really try to shake loose the foundations of this world.  They are trying to innovate and captivate every chance they get.  Daring people are not stable and because of that, they help get a lot of rules changed and perfected because they can't just settle for what they're handed.  They want to be free and they want to free others.  There is no norm, limit or restriction that you can put on a daring person.  No matter their capacity, they will find a way to rebel and make things better.  Daring people are dope and definitely should be a best friend to every one of us.

Together, the daring and fearful make the world go 'round.  That's why gang leaders, world leaders, heads of households, siblings and business partners who succeed tend to have a STAFF.  They do this because usually they lack one of these qualities and in order to make things, actions, or thoughts, popular, you have to be able to speak the language of all the people in your land, right?  So it's important to have a healthy balance of the two in your life.

As for the lost ones, of which I consider myself, we get to the crossroads of life that every one comes to and although we know we're daring (or fearing), we start to think that we should fear (or dare) where we really have no place playing that role!  Obviously are lives will be sprinkled with opportunities to role play and put the opposite skill into practice a lot of times; BUT it's usually pretty clear what your choice SHOULD be at each moment.  So we get stuck in some areas of life and we wait and wait and wait for a more clear sign to pop up alongside the road to tell us when to make our next move!

We'll make some progress from time-to-time, in these areas, but most of it is fleeting and not quantifiable.  So we wait and wait and drive along and the next thing you know, we're in the desert... waiting.  And waiting some more!

The good thing about confusion, hopelessness, and 'waiting' is that they are definitely a slave to Newton's laws of motion.  Which are, in summation--and in super laymen terms:

1.)  External force has a lot to do with how long something can go on.
2.)  The size of something and how fast it moves or long it goes on has a lot to do with that specific something's insides (? THAT'S A REACH)
3.)  Everything has a polar opposite because it needs to force pushing back on it to keep it going...or not going

And thus we have the solution to confusion, hopelessness, and 'waiting'!  It has everything to do with everything so we should stop acting like it's a very specific, personal, nuance, when in fact, it DOES matter whether or not you like where you live.  And it DOES matter whether or not you like yourself or your co-workers, etc.  The main point is that it all matters and it can all be changed by applying new forces on your own life.  The opposite of confusion is clarity.  It doesn't take much to ask your co-worker to really break down what he/she means about a project or even a side comment they made after a meeting the other day.

The opposite of hopelessness is hope!  (Duh-zies!)  Not hope as in a wish, but hope as in--what I believe is the Hebrew translation--of having a certainty in something.  The feeling of hopelessness between you and that guy can be stopped if you get CLEAR (wink) and then set your certainties on what you know to be true!  If you know it's not going anywhere, there's a certain power there because you can choose to stay or choose to walk away 'cause you not sitting and wishing for something that you're not sure about!

Finally, 'waiting'... Waiting for results, waiting for someone to come alongside you, waiting for a chance, and waiting for the perfect time!  The opposite force of 'waiting' is ACTION!  You can eliminate that confusing wait time for your daring or fearing self, by DOING exactly what you're good at!  If you're 'afraid' to approach your boss for a raise then don't do it the daring way, but do it your way.  Maybe you wait or maybe you use the employee handbook as your reference, but you gotta do SOMETHING, even if that something is nothing!  If you're finally ready to get super fit, don't start off with a cardio dance class, be daring and hit the weights with all the body builders you see at the bench press!

Regardless, the more you wait because you're not sure whether or not to be daring then the more time you spend waiting and being passed by signs that you might understand, but really feel confused, hopeless and paralyzed by.  The key is action, but the courage to step across the threshold is taking that action and doing it YOUR way.

I'm going to apply this by working out and accomplishing things the daring way each time I come to the crossroads.  Every time I feel confused I will really sit and take the time to get clear.  Every time that I feel hopeless, I will refocus my vision and behave in a more certain way.  Every time that I get tempted to wait, I will take the most daring action that I can take in that moment.  A few examples I have put them into practice over the past few weeks (or plan to soon) by:

CONFUSION: 
1.)  Having a clearing with leadership at my job(s) as necessary.  (Done.)

HOPELESSNESS: 
1.)  Revisiting my goals and vision and reminding myself what the real mission is and who it's for.  (Ongoing.)
2.)  Breaking my financial goals and responsibilities into more doable bite sized tasks versus being intimidated by my own damn money!  lol  (Starting now.)

WAITING: 
1.)  I won't be afraid to ask my mentors and role models stupid questions about things that I need to grasp in order to get ahead in my career and life.  (Just did it yesterday.)
2.)  I will not wait until something inspiring comes along to remain super fit.  I'll just accept that I want to be SUPER FIT or nothing at all and embrace it versus blaming races, training, BHAGs*, on why I'm not always performing at my pique levels 24/7.  (Staring now.)

So how can you embrace your daring or fearing characteristics this week?  Where in your life can you afford to get more clear?  What will it take for you to live a life full of certain hope?  How long will it be 'til you stop waiting and start taking the actions that suit you the best?

I hope you can see how there are other people like you out here who are "kind of" and not just fully blazing ahead the way that instagram makes it look!  I also hope that you can also see how it can be done and doesn't just have to be about super big things.

So get to gettin' and don't forget to recruit some great people for your team and life balance.  As the ever lovely, Kim Kardashian, says:  "Teamwork will make the dream work."  We'll go deeper into that some other time.  Cool?

GOOD DAY!

xoxO
MB